monday.

I really want to be that everything happens for a reason.

I really really do.

right now, I just dont get it.

at all.

You never know how much stuff you own...

...until you're forced to move out in a hurry.

and i am sure i left a million things behind.

atleast i got everything desmond needs.

and everything i need for doing hair and making money.

next step. finding a place to live.

I have a meeting with the bishop sunday to see how he can help.

I have kept him updated on things so far.

i guess we will see.

I applied for this job the other day.
It would be reception at a hair salon on the other side of town.

The owner said she couldn't give me a definite answer because not all of the students have come back to her with their new school schedules.

I am secretly praying someone quits, that way I can have the job.

PLUS

there is a daycare in the basement for the employees.

Can we say AMAZING?

I have always been opposed to daycare.
That was until I was put into the situation that I am in now.

And I love the idea that I would be able to go check on him whenever I needed to.

Thats all that happened today.

Thanks for everyones love and support.

I appreciate each and everyone of you.



shellfish makes me cry.

I am not too positive why I wrote anything yesterday.

None of it made sense.

Anywho.

Dear friends and family,

I need your support.

This is my journey of becoming a single mom.

I dont know how this happened or why,

but its happening.

I am in a fragile state.

The sample lady at walmart asked me if I was alright.

I don't blame her.

Normal people don't burst out crying in the seafood section.

I think I knew this was going to happen.
But I never prepared myself correctly.

So now I have this beautiful baby boy that I have to raise basically on my own.

No job. No house. And my wallet is empty.

I can do this. Desmond is counting on me.

For now, I just need prayers.
Lots and lots of prayers.

Maybe advice?

I dont even know what I need right now.

except prayers.

Thanks everyone...
...I still dont think I am making any sense. 

day one. or maybe night one?

not sure what to say at the moment.

this might be a personal blog for now.

ill share with a few close people.

or maybe a hundred.
who knows.

i have a hard time with words.

so maybe putting them down first will help?

all i know is that this is going to be one hard year.

but i can do it.

more tomorrow.
i am way too exhausted.
and my eyelids are puffy.